When you find that the backlog of those little apple juice boxes that your wife puts in your lunch has almost filled the comestibles fridge at work, do not take them all out and drink them all at once. If you do, you will rumble, bloat and fart for hours; you will shit green slurry until your fundamental orifice puckers in reflexive terror at each fresh gurgle; you will come to believe that angry weasels are eating their way out of your intestines. Got it? Do not gorge on apple juice: it does not love you back.